Atomic Experiment Creates Pink Elephants
September 10th 2008 03:51
What we will likely see after the particle-colliding experiment in France
The massively controversial particle collider on the French-Swiss border will fire up in 5 hours and could destroy us all. At least I'd like to think so, then I don't have to go to work. Several doomsday parties are said to have been planned across the globe, with the biggest reported to be in America's Deep South and, surprisingly, in Versailles. The Hawaiian lawsuit seemed to have failed and the project is going ahead.
The physicists claim that the Earth receives cosmic rays from space that carry more energy than the collider, and no one has reported black holes opening up in their front yards, so what's the harm? A valid point one must concede since I have no idea about it and he seems to be the expert. Although one particular physicist, Lykken stated that
"In theory, the probability that the LHC will produce pink elephants is not zero."
In all his expert knowledge, this physicist can dispel the death of the planet has hogwash but, like any solid reporter, won't fabricate evidence to the contrary of the more pressing theory of elephant colourization. Despite the relief that only climate change will destroy our planet, Black Hole theorist and Astrophysicist Stephen Hawking felt the need to reassure us even further. Hawko announced an even bet of no less than $110 that not only will his beloved black holes not appear, but that the experiment won't even discover the holy grail of particle-colliding science. Which so far has only discovered that it is indeed the wooden cup over the golden one.
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